Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Randomize
