I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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