she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
