super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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