well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
