Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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