I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize