How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
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