You can't motorboat a personality
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
we should paint friendship bongs
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