Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Randomize
