This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
