we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
She tied me up with her honor cords...
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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