we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
