So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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