so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
birth control should be required to get into college
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Randomize
