I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
