So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
