I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
