Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
