Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
