why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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