so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
