my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
