Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
