Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
