She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
