i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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