Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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