Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
