Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
