i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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