My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
