Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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