I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
