Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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