He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
