D3 body, D1 cock
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Randomize
