Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
