How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
