I wish I could punch you in the face.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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