Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
