never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
