Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Randomize
