Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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