Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
smell my finger.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
