Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
