I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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