If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
