Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
