...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
