I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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