I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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